Friday, January 4, 2008

To say good bye to one you thought you loved

Todays existence is as diverse as the landscape. One moment someone acts like they care for you in all you are and who you will be and the next moment they just want to leave what you thought was solidified. Reality it would seem is not without a sense of irony. So another in the series of events with one who I cared for and yet I wonder if it was just a game or it was more real then that. I wonder what could of occured, what may of occured and how life could of been. To ponder such possibilities, to consider the fact that it may just be an extensive act is tough to understand and deal with. yet I wonder as I look at this situation. So many turns of events, so many occurences, simple as a forgotten birthday though not really forgotten, and not getting your way for some reason always expecting it. Is it a reason to quit such a relationship over a year and continuing onward to think that the plan was to go to phillipines, to go and see her, to perhaps take the steps to marry her. Apparently it was only a fantasy, a false idea of what was thought to be so ideal. Marriage in itself must be far more involved then all that to make it meaningful it appears. So I sit here wondering what could of been, what I thought was going to come together, to take such a trip to verify the dedication. Perhaps it was for the best, this turn of events.

I still care for you babe ko but apparently you do not feel the same. So take care and will talk to you another time in another parallel life or perhaps it will be all but forgotten. The future cannot be seen so I can only focus on the present and the possibilities of tommorow.

In Sadness posted, varying existence beyond the moment.


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